There is power in the name of Jesus

It’s amazing what God uses to bring us closer to Him.   I want to share with you what has been going through my life in the last month that I wasn't able to share before today.

On December 19, I had a doctor’s appointment.  It was time for my yearly exam, the one thing that every woman dreads, especially me.  Last year at this time, I was finding out I had Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) and had tiny little cysts on my ovaries.  This year, I was hoping for good news.

But then the doctor said the words no one ever wants to hear.  She felt a lump in my left breast and wanted me to go in for more tests, an ultrasound to start. 

My heart dropped.  So many thoughts went through my mind.  Cancer.  I have no insurance.  Cancer.  I’m too young.  Cancer. 

The nurse gave me the orders for the ultrasound and an application to have my ultrasound covered by a program called Links for Life.  She said that it may take a little bit to hear if I had been approved.  The next 2 weeks were some of the hardest I’I've had to live through.

Every time I started worrying, I started praying.  I shed many tears and hid many more from my friends and family.   Being alone was the worst.  There was no one to occupy my thoughts, no one I had to hide the tears from.  Driving in the car to work, I listened to K-Love.  God knew what songs I needed to hear to remind me to give it all to Him. 

7eventh Time Down’s song “Just Say Jesus” was one of those songs.

When you don't know what to say
Just say Jesus
There is power in the name
The name of Jesus
If the words won't come
Cause you're too afraid to pray
Just say Jesus

Last week, I got the call that my ultrasound had been approved.  I called and scheduled an appointment for January 8.  I was nervous and scared, even more so than I had been in the past 2 weeks.

I started shaking in the dressing room while changing into the gown.  I was so nervous I was cold and felt like I couldn’t get warm.  The ultrasound tech explained what she was going to be doing and asked me to show her where the doctor found the lump. 

She examined and took pictures of my right breast and then moved to my left breast.  My heart rate went up.  After scanning and taking pictures, she asked me again where the lump was because she couldn't find it.  And I couldn't find it.  The tech then went and got the doctor and the doctor couldn't find it.

The doctor told me I could get dressed; the tests were negative.

I got up, got dressed and walked out to the truck where Kevin was waiting.  And then broke down in tears while Kevin prayed with me, thanking God.

We went to Hobby Lobby afterwards and playing overhead was the instrumental version of “You Are My All in All.”  And even today the song is still running through my head, the words fitting perfectly with how I’m feeling.

You are my strength when I am weak
You are the treasure that I seek
You are my all in all
Seeking You as a precious jewel
Lord, to give up I'd be a fool
You are my all in all

Taking my sin, my cross, my shame
Rising up again I bless Your name
You are my all in all
When I fall down You pick me up
When I am dry You fill my cup
You are my all in all

Jesus, Lamb of God
Worthy is Your name
Jesus, Lamb of God
Worthy is Your name

I'm no fool, I am not giving up on my God.  I will continue praising Him, remembering how He used this to bring me closer to Him.